so we get to brooke's house and ethan and josiah run and jump in her lap. it was just beautiful. every now and then brooke would look at ethan and smile really big. she loves her brothers. her brothers are the only ones that i know of that can get that close/personal to her for a lengthy amount of time w/o getting slapped or hit. it's just precious.

i got to spend some time w/brooke yesterday at the group home. she seemed a bit reserved and to her self...however it was great to be in her space and sit close to her!

even though she is just 3 miles down the road i miss her!

easter

yes, i'm just now experiencing Easter in July...in more ways than just one.

brooke came to church w/us on Easter...and it was adorable!

she crossed her legs and everything while she was in her dress...

finger/Advocate

brooke has been picking at her fingers so badly that 2 infections have come up on different fingers. she has been to the doctor w/both and they have drained them. she has lost each finger nail and has been on a anti-biotic to ilmenite further infection. it looks painful and must feel painful.

the boys at the cottage got to meet brooke yesterday. josiah and ethan answered the questions they had..it was sweet. josiah and ethan were so proud to introduce her to them! i loved seeing the excitement!

Just yesterday bill and i were talking about Jesus being our Advocate. I loved thinking on Him as such and it was a huge encouragement to me knowing that He has not only paid the price for us...but daily He fights for us and presents us to His Father....
I love being an advocate for Brooke. I will continue to be her voice and fight for her when she cannot...

just beautiful

just so you know....when we are off duty at the children's home i do not have access to a computer to share information, news, pictures, etc...except on facebook. we do not own a computer right now....so posting does not happen as often as i would like...

with that said...we have been out of pocket for 10 days. bill went to Guatemala and i took the boys to Memphis, saw family, visited some special friends, and came back home to spend some one-one-one with brooke. Bill had a very interesting trip out of the country....and me, i felt like i went out of the country as well. Needless to say it was good for all of us!

It was great to spend so much time with brooke. i took her to the dentist in Pensacola, Fl ate lunch at the relief house and then i took her back to her group home...later that Tuesday night she spent the night w/me and we had a little slumber party. we ate pizza and drank coke in the bed...watching TV of course! it was truly a girls night! she finally drifted off to sleep around 10:30. i took her to school the next day. Wednesday and Thursday i was busy packing up our relief house for us all to move to another house the children's home owns. i spent more time w/her at her group home both days...just hanging out in her world. bill came back on Thursday night...so Friday we grabbed her for some ice-cream at marble slab. the picture (on facebook) is just amazing!!! i will have to post it on the blog soon.

Sunday was a beautiful day with brooke. i asked her staff if they could join us at church...and gladly they came. i love when she comes to church w/us. typically we sit in the back and every now and then you hear a "yep" or "hello" echo thru the sanctuary. i love the sounds she makes! Sunday, i had no idea we would get to participate in the Lord's Supper. brooke has never been in a service w/us where we have done this as a family..but Sunday was our day. i wish you could have seen and experienced what i saw. leaning on her daddy's shoulder she watched us carefully as i grabbed 3 pieces of the bread and 3 cups of the "juice"...(after she hit the tray w/her foot...i almost lost it all...but thankfully i caught it.) at "our" special time, i gave the piece to brooke in her little fingers and she put it in her mouth...and then we proceeded. it was beautiful! i cannot paint the picture w/words, not could i "paint" it at all except to say it was so peacefully beautiful! i will never forget that day. i needed that day...and God knew it!

God is the keeper of our hearts. He is doing a work in our hearts and i'm finding that i cannot be without Him not one second. I'm trusting that He is making a way for us...for all of us. As the proverbs says.."and she smiles at her future".

Brooke's future is all smiles....and i'm leaning heavily on Him for it!

the report is in

it was a great day on the road with brooke to birmingham to the doctor. the only time she displayed behavior is when we got out of the car to go into the office. after she was offered "dora the explorer" her world was good to go!

the doctor made some suggestions especially that of her diet. brooke as recently lost some weight and because of her height she is in need for more calories/intake. over the past few months her hands/wrist have needed some attention. her fingers/wrist are swollen because she bites them in moments of stress. it was suggested to protective wrist band in the night so that if she hits it against the bed/wall she will be safe. during the day her staff attends to her behavior as needed to protect her from any further damage.

all in all the appointment was good. they noticed improvement.

I didn't get to see her yesterday...but today i hope to run over & kiss her face.

brooke...Jesus has got you! (and your mommy)

are you kidding me?

has it really been this long since i posted? i am so sorry for the delay...i have been in a world of my own and time has slipped away. However....i'm eager in "getting back".

My summer work schedule has not allowed me to visit/work with brooke at the school...so i go to her group home and catch up on all the activities of the day. i enjoy seeing her at the group home and i'm learning alot of how she plays, interacts, does chores, and etc.

Brooke is so tall, beautiful, and full of energy!

Brooke has her yearly doctors appointment in Birmingham tomorrow. we will journey up with 2 of her staff and see Dr. Percy. I will post pictures tomorrow and share information about her visit.

until then...yes, we are still alive!

I know...

lately i just haven't posted like i use to. i guess i'm just so busy. in january bill and i switched from taking care of teenage girls to elementary boys! BIG DIFFERENCE. i usually don't post anything on my work life because basically it doesn't have much to do w/brooke. but, lately, we have been getting use to the transition from the girls to the boys. i guess it will never be quite the same (boys and girls are so different)...but it is a bit nice to be the only girl in the house. :-)


these past weeks josiah and ethan have expressed more about brooke than they have in the past. could be some of the movies they have seen lately or maybe....they're just missing their big sister. ethan laid in his bed the other night and cried so hard saying, "i wish brooke wasn't autistic. i want her to live with us." okay, i know i grieve from time to time...but when your child grieves, it hurts...big time. i love seeing brooke w/her brothers. they can be all up in her space and she just looks at them and laughs. sometimes she throws punches, but then again what are sisters for...especially when your all up in a "girl's space." gotta love it!



we had brooke over this past sunday night to spend the night w/us at the relief house. it was a short visit...but it was precious. i love waking up w/her at my side. sometimes i'm awakened w/a slap to my face and other times a soft kiss on my head, cheek, elbow, shoulder...she makes the connection, and it is precious. it makes me smile when she just lays there very still, silent, and i can hear and feel her heart beat. it makes me wonder. i love brooke so much.



today i will have lunch w/her.

brooke and me

most of you know i am observing at TLT twice a week to help w/brooke. i am learning a ton. i appreciate her staff letting me hang in there w/them.

brooke's b/day is march 6th, saturday. she will be 13!

we've come a long way baby...happy early birthday! i give you my life!

laundry time

can't say i'm always that happy about doing laundry! this shot was taken at her group home....just precious!

christmas, friends, rest

here are a few pictures from Christmas at her group home

her direct staff (tiffany, in the yellow shirt), and jennifer (regional director, in brown sweater) helped brooke open her gifts. I'm grateful for her precious staff that dedicate their lives to reach out to children like brooke.

we also had a very special treat a couple weeks ago. Laura (one of brooke's therapist back up north came for a visit. she was able to see brooke (now almost as tall as her) at her group home. i did take a picture but i haven't downloaded it yet....but i will. however the first picture you see is of laura working w/brooke years ago and then w/me when she was here. ld...it was wonderful to see you. you are a dear friend and your precious little baby is a blessing! enjoy her! i love you.

==============

Mark 6:31 says "come away and rest awhile". personally, this is where i am. i have alot on my plate right now...a wonderful and yet raw plate.

some days i wish brooke and i could go on a trip and make up many years...however,

i had a very dear friend tell me recently something i have never thought of...she said, "dani, stop thinking so much....if i sat and thought of everything i would be missing out on then i would be missing what is in front of me and we are not guaranteed tomorrow." those may not be the exact words, but very powerful for me. i am resting....resting in what i have and loving it.

update 2110

I apologize for the delay in blogging. work has kept me on my toes as we have know transitioned into the boys cottage. we have 5 boys which makes 7...bill making 8 and me...yes, the only girl in the house. all is going well w/the change.

Update on Brooke:

this past season (as you have noticed w/no blogs) have been difficult, unmanageable, and for me personally sad. i have been grieving for some time now. you'll notice that about me. i don't blog when i'm really down. however things are looking up. let me give you the low down on all that has happened in the past few months.

brooke finally got off her behavior meds. a week later she started her cycle for the first time, she got a new roommate and she moved to another classroom. yes, that is alot for an autistic child. none of this was planned but it sure happened. thanksgiving and Christmas as i mentioned in an earlier post was difficult. i will post some picture soon. our camera has not been working well. i also wanted to get her new years eve/day....after her arriving to house for a 2 hour visit she left 45 minutes earlier. it was probably the worst visits to the cottage.

however, just this past weekend she came to the relief house w/us and it was like another child! she was happy and loving. i was able to sleep w/brooke and it felt wonderful to wake up beside her in the morning.

we are not aware of all the behavior changes going on right now but her staff are working hard to find the function of her behaviors. i am going to the school twice a week now and i'm learning so much which helps when she does come home for a visit.

even though life is a bit tough w/her at times does not change our love and attention to her. she is a beautiful child and i'm grateful God blessed me w/her. God has also blessed me w/many wonderful people that work with her at the school and i am a different person b/c of the love and compassion they show to children w/special needs.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas!!!

we are enjoying spending family time w/one another. we are working at the home but brooke is over for Christmas eve and Christmas day! there is nothing like being together, no matter how short it is!

have a wonderful holiday!!

laughter

she cracks me up!!!

rough road

sorry for the lack of updating. i was a bit discouraged Thanksgiving and haven't felt like writing much.
Brooke did not do very well Thanksgiving Day. after 30 minutes of being here i was almost ready to take her back to her group home. we were on duty at the cottage so it was a bit hard to manage both worlds. she settled down for just a tiny bit but into the night we had to take her back to TLT so they could get her behaviors controlled.
it was hard and we were not able to take any pictures of the visit.
we had hoped to take her to Memphis next week for Christmas but have decided it wouldn't be the best idea.
we will be working on Christmas and do hope Brooke can come to the cottage for a few days in a row; however, she will not spend the night.

if you could remember her in your prayers as brooke continues to transition with new surroundings and people. pray also for her staff as they daily work w/her and all the children. they are amazing people!

soon...

and very soon, brooke will be joining us for a Thanksgiving meal.

it'll be the first time she'll be spending the night at the cottage...it'll be so sweet to have her here with us.

i'll be putting up some pictures later.

very thankful to be near her and my family this year!

some days...

are harder than others. tonight brooke cannot escape my mind and i miss her being in the same house with me. i'm grateful for the care she is getting and her improvement; however, the grief still remains at times.

just having one of those nights i guess.

another thing that has not escaped my mind is a story in the Bible. the story is of the woman that had a hemorrhage for many years and she reached out to touch the cloak of Jesus and she was healed. I love this story! what i've thought of is the fact that she pressed thru the crowd. i can just see her moving her arms like a swimmer doing brush strokes...digging thru the crowd to get to Jesus or get to Him enough to touch the hem of His garment. i love the idea of "pressing thru". i guess this is where i'm at spiritually...pressing thru to touch, get near, embrace, lean heavily on, clasp, and hold onto Him.

i'm mindless without Him.

small changes

boy, i haven't posted anything in a while....we have been very busy at the cottage and our laptop broke. bummer!

about a 1 1/2 ago brooke was put on some medication to help with her behaviors. as of a couple of weeks ago she completely came off these meds. brooke's behaviors have changed quite a bit. last saturday she was suppose to come to the cottage for dinner. i was encouraged NOT to get her, she was having a hard day.

this past week we were on break. she spent part of the afternoon and had dinner with us. it was good to have her in our home for a short time. as a friend says to me "i take what i can get".

yesterday she got a well needed haircut.
she will spend Thanksgiving with us next week and i hope she'll be able to spend then night.

I'm grateful this year that we live so close to one another. i love you brookie!

running

i love this picture....brooke's shadow looks like a cross and it appears as if she was running to it. i love the irony of it all!

i'm running to the cross with you brooke. thank you for your gentle reminders.

together

lately i have really been longing to see some special friends. grieving if you will because we live so far from one another. i love what paul says in Philippians 1:7 "i long to see you with the affection of Christ Jesus".

tonight i was reading amy carmichael's "Edges of His Ways". this is what i read:

2 thess. 2:1, "our gathering together with Him."

We may be separated now, we may see little of some whom we want to see often. there are many partings in life; never once are we promised the joy of long continuance together here, but "our gathering together unto Him" is a certain joy. everyday as it passes brings us nearer that day when we shall gather together unto Him. if it can be such joy to be together here, what will it be to be gathered There?

I enjoy reading things from amy! i love my friends and i love my family! i can't wait to be gathered up with Him. and when i am gathered with Him with brooke i'm wondering what her first words to me will be...futhermore, i'm wondering what her first words to Jesus will be!

what a moment....wouldn't you like to be there?

missing you

i miss you brooke...

you'll get to spend the night with me soon!