a call in the night

i had noticed that brooke had not been feeling well on saturday. she was quiet in her chatter, she wasn’t smiling like she normally does, and i could tell she wasn’t her typical self. 

early sunday morning around 4am i woke to take brooke to the bathroom but before i got out of bed i heard coming from her bedroom a sound. i became a bit more alert and then i heard a distress sound of “Mommmma” and then seconds later, “Mommmy”. i jumped up out of bed and went to her room. she just looked at me as if she was asking for help. i asked her if she was hurting, no words this time but a grunt and she slapped her head (a sign of pain). i grabbed some medicine for her and covered her back up to go back to sleep. when i was about to walk out of her room she looked at me and with a much calmer tone and said, “mommy”.  i smiled and said, “you’ll feel better soon, i love you.”

ok. wow! i’ll never forget this day, not because she was in pain, but that she called out for me because she was in pain. she has NEVER intentionally called out my name for me to come and help her. i got back in bed and honestly, could not sleep. i was so excited that she called my name when she was hurting. 

there have been many times i’ve done that with the Lord. i’ve been hurting, grieving, sad, or struggling with something personal that in the middle of where i was just saying His name, “Jesus”, brought comfort, healing, peace, security.... for when we say His name, we don’t just get a piece of Him, we get all of Him and all that His name promises to be!  it’s His very nature to respond. He is near to us when we cry, mumble, or just whisper His name. 

“The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth.” Psalms 145:18 ESV

step by step

we have had so many great adventures since brooke has been home. clearly she is so happy and we are elated that our family is back together again. we have daily activities that get us out and about and in the community. however, everyday we try and walk (weather permitting) around the block or at the park nearby. one particular day we started off on our walk in our neighborhood but something was wrong. one thing about walking with brooke is that she likes to walk closely to you, almost hip to hip, holding your hand or arm. it’s actually pretty sweet! however, something was off during our walk that day. as we went around the block our step was off and our arms hit each other as we walked. we got home and the Lord started speaking to me personally. it was like i could verbally hear Him, “Dani, we have to walk step by step, in sync, getting off step with Me can cause you to miss out on what I have for you, abide with Me.” i have been thinking about that day and the way Brooke challenges me without words. i was reminded of a song by Jesus Culture “Where You Go I Will Go”

-What You say I say

What You pray I pray

Jesus only did what He saw You do

He would only say what He heard You speak

He would only move when He felt You lead

Following Your heart, following Your spirit

How could I expect to walk without You

When every move that Jesus made was in surrender

I will not begin to live without You

For You alone are worthy, You are always good-

Brooke reminded me that day it’s imperative to walk closely by My Lord, walking in step with His Spirit, abiding, clinging, lingering long, and in a sweet surrender.