guessing

there are things I don't understand autism. I guess I'm not suppose to. most days are a guessing game of why/how.

today was a day of guessing:

why does she smile looking at the window one moment and then smacks it repetitively the next.

what causes her to come up behind me to hug me with passion and the next moment slap the glasses off my face.

what makes her laugh and run thru the house playing "boo" and chase and then in the next moment hit a lamp off the table.

I could guess and watch behavior all day long but it's still autism. basically, it's still something that steals from our family and possibly yours.

don't get me wrong, I'm a pretty optimistic gal. however, in all my guessing I know one thing is certain...of all the things the Lord has brought me thru I'm confident of His plan.

confident the Lord holds her, heals her, loves her, nurtures her, gives her peace, restores her, Fathers her, embraces her, holds her tears in a bottle, has her name inscribed in His hand.

He is not one bit surprised at her smiles, laughter, tears, disability or the frustrations she experiences...because He made her.

even though there are days I may guess, wonder, and am driven with passion to help her...I know He never makes one mistake and NEVER guesses.